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“You’re feeling very sensitive to the problems of other people — your empathy is high, and your thoughts could be distracted by worry. This is not a comfortable feeling, and this level of compassion for others might not be too healthy for you. You’ve been putting the needs and wishes of other people over your own for too long, and you need to work harder to find balance. You deserve to think of yourself first once in a while. Don’t concern yourself with the problems of others.”

Maybe it’s right. For a long time I've shown my “Superwoman” personality. Now I’ve come to realize that even superheroes do get hurt sometimes.

I put the needs of other people above my own. I let my own happiness pass by cos I thought I’d be happier by helping someone in need, by supporting him all the way and providing everything even without him asking for it. For a time it was fulfilling, I realized my worth as a person as well as a significant other. That I could make a change in a person’s life.

But when reality punched me so hard, my world turned upside down. I thought I made a mistake. I did the improper by giving everything to the wrong person. He’s not worth my sufferings, my sacrifices and my tears.. yet after some time it came to me that there is nothing to regret.

Everything I did came out of love. I should not blame myself for giving him the whole universe. Instead, I should applaud myself for showing people what true love means.

By knowing what true love is, I should then learn to love myself from now on.


Sex believes to be beneficial to our health. It makes people lose weight by burning the fat and carbohydrates as if you’re running on a treadmill.  Also for aesthetics, it can be a woman's beauty treatment since it doubles the estrogen level of the body that makes skin softer and hair shinier.  It also purifies the pores through sweating, hence, making skin look brighter.

While having sex brings about a lot of physiological/physical benefits, abstinence or not having it results to anxiety, that sometimes leads to paranoia and depression. In fact, when you are depressed before having sex, it will diminish due to the endorphins that brain releases that leads you to the state of euphoria.

And what will happen if you realize that not having sex for a long time gives you series of misery everyday? Most people result to having sex without attachment or romantic involvement. Just to gratify the longing of his/her physical well being.

The sad thing is that, sex sets off “fatal expectation” (my friends' usual discussion).  I remember one time a friend sent me an SMS that says:

“If you don’t want to fall in love, then don’t have sex. What’s the relevance? Having sex releases feel-good hormones dopamine in excessive amount. What’s worse is it also releases oxytocin, a hormone found to be responsible for being attached to a person. So the more you have sex, the more you’ll fall in love and that’s a fact.”

Of course, prostitutes who do sex for a living are exception to the rule.

There are instances that a person knows where to situate himself/herself in his/her partner’s life yet it’s not always easy to stand firm.  You know you only have sex due to physical desires yet you will wait for more. You want more. You wish that someday, somehow, this silly activity will result into something deeper. And you begin to fall in love..

It will never be easy for me to criticize since I am not in the position to do so.

Instead, I have two options here that you may want to think about:

  1. Never give yourself the chance to come closer, so as not to bring yourself to despair of wanting some more even when you know where to stand.
  2. Risk. It feels good to see how brave you can be and how far you can go. It can save you from sleepless nights of wondering about what might have been.

You choose for yourself.

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